A woman has revealed how she thought she was a boy growing up, until she got her period and started to grow boobs.
Emma Lynn Dowd was encouraged to play with footballs and toy cars when growing up, as well as take on other hobbies which are often considered stereotypically male-focused by society.
She believed she was a boy for two decades until she learned the truth aged 18. It was then that she was told she was a hermaphrodite with both male and female sex organs. This meant she had both ovarian and testicular tissue on the out and inside.
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Emma says she 'doesn't know' why her parents decided to bring her up as a boy, but claims it 'doesn't matter' now.
“I have no idea why my parents decided to bring me up as a boy,” Emma, now 44, from Connecticut, US, revealed. And honestly, now, it doesn’t really matter.
“Had I not had that experience I couldn’t have seen life through a man’s eyes, which at times has proven to be extremely helpful. Growing up, it was very difficult because I had a feeling I was different to other children – and my interests, desires and thoughts were ‘girly’.
"I mimicked other boys to try to learn to be male.I never had gender dysmorphia, I was always okay with how I looked, but I would always be accused of being a ‘chick’.
“I was also severely bullied because people thought I was gay. And high school was difficult, as my body finally decided to go into puberty, and that was when I started seeing signs that I could be female.”
When Emma got her first period and began developing breasts, she was given testosterone tablets to stop the process. She said: “It was very common back then. Some activists believe you should wait for the child to make the choice, but this is just what my parents thought of doing at the time.”
It wasn’t until Emma went off to college at 18 that she realised her anatomy was very different to that of other men in the locker room. “It was then I fully realised I was female," she said. "I had mixed emotions; it validated the internal feelings and desires I had, and it confirmed for me that I wasn’t gay. At the same time, I was horrified as I felt I had to hide my condition. I felt like a hybrid and a freak.”
For years afterwards, Emma – who believed it was too late to “reverse” her gender – carried on living as a man, until an accident in 2019 that would change her life forever.
“It was early in the morning and I was going to the playpen where I put my dog," she said. "All of a sudden I slipped and hit my head on a piece of PVC pipe sticking out of a rack. It hit the very base of my skull, splitting it open. I was still awake, so immediately took myself to the doctor.”
According to Emma, doctors told her the trauma to her head was weakening the testosterone production in her body. She took this as a sign to discuss her condition; during recovery, Emma asked to be put on hormone replacement therapy (HRT) to transition into a woman.
She said: “[When doctors told me the news], I was confused, as I thought it was just a concussion. But I was also happy, I was about to enter this new way of life as a woman. I was shocked when they told me I could be a woman, but it made sense. I was put on HRT and told to let my body do its own thing.”
By 2021, Emma had long hair, was getting her period again and had developed breasts. “I also got a name change, to the name my mother had planned to give me if I was born a girl," she said. "I have never spoken to my parents about why they brought me up as a boy, because in my mind, they made a choice out of love. I do not blame anyone for it.
"My parents have been supportive of my transition and we've talked about things, we're on good terms now. My friends have been very supportive – there were a few who were ‘weirded out’ but I don't speak to them anymore. I am me now, I want to live an anger-free and happy life without any grudges towards anyone.”
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