Trying to kill me! Jeremy Clarkson attacked by cow as he endures lowest point on farm

Jeremy Clarkson says Grand Tour co-stars haven’t visited farm

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Jeremy Clarkson suffered his “lowest point” since taking up farming just last month. Speaking out today for the first time, the presenter recalled being attacked by a cow at Diddly Squat.

I was on my knees in the mud with crossed eyes

Jeremy Clarkson

The 61-year-old was attempting to get his herd inside his new £175,000 barn when the issue arose.

As well as battling the stubborn animals, The Grand Tour host also didn’t have the weather on his side.

Storm Barra hit his Cotswold property, and he was forced to work outside in “rain that hurt”.

Detailing the tough situation in his latest column, Jeremy said it was just one degree Celsius alongside 80mph winds.

But it was when one of his cows targeted him that things really took a turn.

The ex Top Gear regular hit back at the suggestion the animals cannot kick backwards, saying “this isn’t true”.

Jeremy wrote: “They are like Bruce Lee, only more deadly and determined because, having failed to connect with her hoofs, she went for another tack, putting her head between my legs and then raising it smartly.

“Immediately I was on my knees in the mud with crossed eyes, trying to push the cow away.”

“I think this was the lowest point in my farming career to date,” the father-of-three claimed.

“Being attacked by a cow while on my knees, in the mud, in a storm, with smashed testicles.”

Jeremy said he was “miserable” during the ordeal, as he referenced why he was rearing the cows.

He added in The Sunday Times: “And all so I can make beef for a restaurant that I probably won’t be allowed to open.

“… Happily, though, the attack cow eventually grew tired of trying to kill me and decided, for no reason that I could see, to walk calmly through the gate and on to the track.”

Jeremy’s difficult task certainly didn’t stop there, with all but one from the flock taking up their new residence.

He was left looking for the female for an hour in the dark, before giving up.

It eventually returned to the field where it had been living.

This certainly isn’t the first injury Jeremy has sustained since taking over the farm.

A few weeks ago, he was taken to hospital after slicing his thumb off in a terrifying kitchen drama.

He and girlfriend Lisa Hogan were practising making chilli-flavoured crisps to sell at Diddly Squat Farm at the time.

Jeremy’s horrendous mishap was all down to him using a mandolin to slice the potatoes, before slicing his hand open too.

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